Treating Each Other More Humanly at Work – What I Don’t Mean

by Mary on February 10, 2009 · 2 comments

in All Posts,How to be a More Empowered Manager,Manager/ Employee Communication,What it Means to Treat People Humanly at Work

I find that when I talk to people about this idea of treating each other more humanly at work, that I have to talk as much about what it isn’t as about what it is. So, let me be clear, I am not talking about:

Treating People at Work Like Family

Ever see the cartoon that shows a big banner in an auditorium stating “Conference for Adult Children of Functional Families?”  Of course the auditorium is empty.

Some people have pretty bad associations with the word “family.“  Even if you think that is being hyper-sensitive, why work against that obstacle as you are establishing or adapting your work culture?

Even in trying to emulate the best of families, the comparison of workplace to family sets up unrealistic expectations.  A workplace is not a home.  Co-workers are not family.  At some point some decision is going to be made, or action taken, that is right for the business and its employees, but is “unfamily-like.”  That just disillusions people.

Idealizing a family atmosphere at work does not help us.  In order to be effective today, our organizations must move beyond this and redefine working relationships, more toward responsible adult to responsible adult, treating each other humanly.

Also, what I don’t mean is:

Giving Employees Everything They Want

Once I led a team called the “Valuing People Team.”  When you lead the Valuing People team, people feel implied permission to tell you how everything you do either does or does not “value people.”  In any case, I was “debating” with one of our site leaders.

He was challenging me saying, “Mary, so we shouldn’t layoff those 50 people at Plant X because that wouldn’t be valuing people, right?”  My response was, “It is not exactly valuing people to keep them on the job when you can’t pay them, now is it?”  A light-bulb went off over his head, “You mean valuing people doesn’t mean giving people everything they want?”

What I am talking about is not warm and fuzzy or soft and squishy.  It is about treating each other as the adults at work that we are.  This is not always comfortable or pleasant, for instance, when it comes to holding each other accountable for getting the job done for which we are paid.  But this can also be done very “humanly.”

I don’t mean soft-pedaling feedback so much that the person doesn’t get it, and doesn’t realize their job is at stake.  But I do believe there is a way to be fully honest and set the foundation for the feedback to land on the best prepared ground possible.


Related posts:

  1. Treating People at Work Humanly – part 57 (She Just Won’t Get Off the Subject…)
  2. Relate More Humanly at Work: The Role of Leaders and HR
  3. Part 3: Relate More Humanly at Work – the Role of Leaders and HR

{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

brastacor December 20, 2010 at 9:44 am

” A workplace is not a home. Co-workers are not family. At some point some decision is going to be made, or action taken, that is right for the business and its employees, but is “unfamily-like.” That just disillusions people.”
Are you sure that this is true?

Mary December 20, 2010 at 11:10 am

Thank you so much for bringing that up. I believe there are always exceptions.

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